1.26.2015

consuming fears

https://33.media.tumblr.com/15b397f23dc12eeb897a3b473050d0ec/tumblr_ning6kPwfG1s3ulybo1_500.gif

What do you do when you wake up in the middle of night,
frozen in fear?

What do you do when everything looks evil in the darkness?

When you're too afraid to move?

Tears I didn't know I was crying,
they find their way down my cheek and into my hair.

And the awful nightmare
it replays itself over and over in my mind.

"Please, help me, God,"
I whisper. 
"Don't let these fears overtake me."

I wish for a hand to hold or for someone to hug,
but I cannot move.

The darkness outside the window adds to my fear.

You are alone.

I hear everything around me screaming it.

You are ignored and unloved. No one can save you now. There is no one who cares for you nor anyone who will ever love you again. Everyone you love? They don't love you. They are going to die and you can't do anything about it. You. Are. Worthless.

Sleep is calling me,
but I do not want it. 

I do not want the nightmares haunting my sleep, 
refusing to let me go. 

"Hold me, God."
It's the only thing I can say. 
"Don't ever let me go."

In the light of day,
those fears seem so silly. 

But, at night when you're alone,
you cannot pretend to be brave. 

Psalm 38:10
My heart pounds, my strength fails me;
even the light has gone from my eyes. 

Psalm 38:21-22
O Lord, do not forsake me; be not far from me, O my God.
Come quickly to help me,O Lord my Savior. 

12 comments:

  1. Beautiful, as always.
    Question for you...where do you get your inspiration for such writing pieces? They are all so unique and beautiful, your style is unlike anything I've ever seen before! xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh my gosh. Thank you SOOO much!

      I'm not sure where I get inspiration; I find it everywhere. Sometimes I pick a picture and base it off of that or I write what has happened to me. Like right here, I had a nightmare last night. Ugghh, terrible things.

      I guess I just write it raw and real and don't think twice before posting. People seem to like it and connect with it more that way. I'm like, "This isn't too awful. I'll post it." and then I get a lot of great feedback and it's just surprising and encouraging. So yeah. :-)

      Delete
  2. This is very true! And you are so right, fears in the middle of daytime seem so silly, but in the middle of the darkness and when we are alone, they are very real!
    Your writing is just so beautiful, and I love how you included verses from the Psalms in there!
    I'm so grateful that we have a God that does care about each of us individually :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, it sucks. :-P

      Aw, thank you so much! I've been reading through Psalms lately. :-)

      Delete
  3. You are such a great writer <3
    http://saltskinned.blogspot.com.au

    ReplyDelete
  4. Gosh, this made me cry! It's so pretty, but it also accurately portrays my darkest fears.

    xoxo Morning

    ReplyDelete
  5. This is so...beautiful? Yet heartrending. So achingly true. Your honesty is brilliant and God's light shines through you--because your darkness He turns to light.

    Thanks for always being amazing, my sweet friend. I wish I could be there to hug you--but know that you've got a God who will NEVER leave you or forsake you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ahhhhhhhh. <333333333333 Thank you so so sos oosososoososoooooooo much.

      HAI GOD LET'S GO GET SOME PIZZA BECAUSE WE GOT ETERNITY WOO ;-) XD

      Delete

you're a peach! ♥ thank you for leaving a comment.